Embracing Asteya: Finding Wholeness in Grief
Welcome to the third post in our new monthly series, which delves into the ancient wisdom of yoga and its profound philosophies. Laura Walton, the founder of lovelew, attests to yoga's incredible healing powers, especially in navigating the turbulent waters of grief. With its deep roots and comprehensive practices, yoga offers a sanctuary for those seeking to reconnect with their bodies and find grounding when other connections seem lost.
Each month, we will explore a different facet of yoga, deepening our understanding of how these practices can support and transform your journey through grief.
This series is not about mastering physical flexibility (although that’s a welcome benefit); it’s about fostering a connection between mind, body, and heart. Through time and practice, yoga can help you find a way to move through your grief.
Yoga isn't just the latest Instagram trend. It's a way of life. An ancient practice, philosophy, and purpose. It’s helpful to consider all 8 limbs of yoga and remember the original intention of yoga. To truly grasp its essence, we must dive into The Eight Limbs of Yoga, starring the yamas and niyamas. Each limb is a step and guidepost leading us onto the path of self-actualization. The yamas and niyamas are the first two practices of yoga. When we focus on these, they light the way for the rest.
The journey through grief, especially after the sudden loss of a partner, is a deeply personal and often isolating experience. For many young women navigating this path, the teachings of yoga, particularly the principle of Asteya (non-stealing), can offer profound insights into how to cope with loss while maintaining a sense of integrity and completeness in one's life. Asteya reminds us to honor boundaries, cherish what we have, and find contentment within ourselves rather than seeking fulfillment from external sources.
Understanding Asteya in the Context of Grief
Asteya goes beyond the simple act of not taking what isn't ours; it encompasses the broader commitment to not covet, steal or take advantage of others' energy, time, or emotions. In the realm of grief, Asteya challenges us to confront our feelings of emptiness and seek healing in ways that respect both our boundaries and those of others around us.
The principle of Asteya is deeply relevant when dealing with the emotional upheavals following the loss of a loved one. It encourages us to look inward and find peace with what we have rather than what we’ve lost. This approach not only helps alleviate the burden of grief but also aids in cultivating a mindset of abundance and gratitude, even in the face of profound loss.
Asteya and Respecting Emotional Boundaries
Grief is unique for everyone. What works for one person might not work for another, and respecting these differences is crucial. Asteya teaches us to honor our grieving process without imposing it on others or letting others dictate how we should feel or heal. It involves setting healthy boundaries around what we are willing to share and how we allow others to treat us during vulnerable times.
Avoiding Comparison
Each relationship is unique, and consequently, so is each grief journey. Asteya guides us in recognizing and respecting this individuality. By avoiding comparisons, we allow ourselves and others the space to experience grief in a manner that's true to our relationship and personal coping style. This respect for personal boundaries is a cornerstone of healing and personal growth.
Avoiding the Theft of Joy
In grief, it can be easy to think that experiencing joy or happiness somehow betrays the memory of the deceased. Asteya encourages us to embrace joy and sorrow, acknowledging that the capacity to feel a range of emotions is a part of being human. Celebrating the joy that was and the happiness that can still be is essential in finding a balanced perspective on life and loss.
Physical Practices of Asteya
Yoga can be a therapeutic tool for embodying the principle of Asteya. Certain poses and practices help foster a sense of balance and grounding, teaching us to draw strength from within:
Tree Pose (Vrikshasana): This balancing pose encourages stability and grounding, reminding us of our strength and resilience.
Dancer Pose (Natarajasana): Focus on openness and grace, affirming your ability to find beauty and balance in life’s challenges.
Half-Moon Pose (Ardha Chandrasana): Emphasize abundance and the fullness of life, even when part of our world feels missing.
Practicing yoga improves physical strength and flexibility and enhances emotional resilience, helping to manage the complexities of grief with grace and patience.
Actionable Practices of Asteya
To truly integrate Asteya into your life during times of grief, consider these actionable practices:
Find a Personal Hobby: Engage in activities that affirm your independence and self-sufficiency. Whether painting, writing, or gardening, find something that reminds you that what you have within you is enough.
Practice Gratitude: Maintain a gratitude journal to remind yourself daily of the abundance still present in your life. This can shift focus from what’s been lost to what remains.
Create Shared Memories: Organize gatherings or memory circles where friends and family can share stories and celebrate the life of your loved one. This helps honor their memory without fixating on the loss.
Embracing Asteya in Daily Life
Implementing Asteya in daily life means practicing honesty, integrity, and respect for oneself and others. It teaches us to cherish the present, appreciate what we have, and find contentment within ourselves. In the context of grief, Asteya offers a framework for healing that respects our emotional boundaries and fosters a sense of completeness, even in absence.
As you navigate your grief journey, let Asteya guide you to a place of peace and acceptance. It’s not about filling the void left behind but about growing around it, learning to live fully and love deeply, with respect for both the past and the potential of the present. This approach doesn't just help us cope with grief—it transforms our entire outlook on life, encouraging a deeper appreciation for the richness of our experiences and the resilience of the human spirit.
